Minnesota football is the worst 8-0 team ever

A few weeks ago, I declared Minnesota football the worst 6-0 team ever, then I said the same thing about the 7-0 team. Heading into Saturday’s game at Penn State, I must declare Minnesota football is the worst 8-0 team in the history of sports at any level.

A reminder: in the nonconference, Minnesota trailed in the fourth quarter against South Dakota State, Fresno State and Georgia Southern.

A reminder: in five Big Ten games, the Gophers have played one starting quarterback and even he got injured.

A reminder: Minnesota celebrated winning Paul Bunyan’s Axe so hard, the whole team nearly died of suffocation.

Do these facts make it seem like we’re dealing with an elite college football team?

Gamble everything on Penn State

I’m not even writing a college football gambling article for this weekend because I want all eyes to be on this game (also Illinois +15 @ Michigan State looks pretty nice). This is a gift to all the followers and fans of Deceptive Speed.

Read this closely. Yes, you.

Stop whatever it is you are doing and check your wallet. Whatever you have in there, put it on Penn State to cover whatever number it is currently. I was able to get Penn State -6, but it doesn’t matter because this will be a three-score game.

If the wallet is empty, find a way to get some cash quick. Maybe just one shift at a part-time job, maybe visit Grandma and swipe a few bucks. However if you go that route, make sure you use half of your winnings on a nice Christmas present for Grandma. Deceptive Speed is pro-Grandma and always has been.

This is going to be 17-7 heading into halftime, and it’s going to be a 31-10 final score. I could not see this game more clearly.

PJ Fleck cashed in

Is it a coincidence Fleck decided to sign his long-term extension before this weekend’s game? The aura of Fleck will never be greater than it is right now. Would a win over Penn State make him that much more money? Maybe not, but a blowout loss in one of the biggest games in Minnesota football history would certainly diminish future expectations.

Take a guess how many games Minnesota football has won against top 25 teams with PJ Fleck as its head coach. I’ll give you time. Don’t scroll down yet…. Okay now you can.




Zero. Not one time has Minnesota beaten a ranked team in the last three seasons. With eight wins, this will be the first time the Gophers have had an above .500 regular season record in Fleck’s three years in Minnesota.

The committee understands

Earlier this week, the College Football Playoff rankings came out and one of the things I was most interested to see was what the committee would think of Minnesota. They came in at #17.

I am of the opinion there are 40 teams better than the Gophers in college football, but I understand they had to be in there considering they are one of the only teams in the sport without a loss.

After what Penn State is about to do to Minnesota on Saturday afternoon, the Gophers should be left out of the rankings entirely.

GameDay should be there

This might be the one opportunity for Minnesota football to be featured on College GameDay. How many times has GameDay been to the LSU-Alabama game? And those games are generally pretty boring. Except for this year, I think it’s going to be awesome. But Minnesota football should get to enjoy this season.

Yes I’m not a believer in Minnesota football in 2019, but College GameDay should absolutely be in Minnesota for the game this weekend.

Regardless, Minnesota football has a 6-6 roster that is currently 8-0 but will finish 8-4. When that happens, this will be the worst 8-4 team in the history of sports.

Photo courtesy of Minnesota Athletic Communications

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